angelsouldevilheart's Xanga

Exposed!

Mon, 25 Aug 2008 02:14:16 GMT

It is raining again. It rained the whole of yesterday and as I look out the window, it is raining yet again. I don't really mind the rain normally, but I'm supposed to play tennis tonight and it's quite difficult to play on wet ground - you tend to slip and slide on the parts of the ground where there's moss.

Too late to apologize...

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 13:56:33 GMT

I've decided that if I don't use it, I might just lose it and that I better practise what I preached. I mean, I tell my students to read, speak, write, listen and even watch as much good English as they possibly can but I haven't written anything frivolous for ages. Most of my writing these days are short functional pieces which do not really have soul - more substance than style and I really believe that writing should be a lot about style.

And so here I am, with a title sampled from some RnB song ringing incessantly in my ears. I wonder actually who in the hell still visits this dusty old site but who knows. As everybody knows, I write for an audience which is why plenty of my previous entries were rather sensationalistic and screaming for attention. Since I'm fast approaching the big three O, I've grown to be more reticent. Well, not really. I've grown quite a temper and especially towards the likes of incompetent service staff.

But my current pet peeve must be glaring headlights. Somedays, I feel I should carry a sledgehammer in my car and at traffic stops, take it out and smash the rear car's headlights to kingdom come, and if the driver comes out, his head as well. Or maybe his head into his headlights in one fell swoop. Why in bleeding hell must they be so damn inconsiderate? I mean, the frustrating thing is that I can't do a damn thing about it, except perhaps, hang back, and tail him/her with my high beam all the way. At least, with oncoming cars, I can actually return the damn favour and blind the bastard, and I have, on many an occasion. I mean...I understand stock white lights which are rather glaring, but headlights which are on constant high beam and especially taxis with one light normal and one on high? What the hell is that? Ok, time to sleep.

Nothing Meaningful

Mon, 01 Oct 2007 15:10:35 GMT

Just read a friend's blog where he shared his experience of going to Geylang. I realize that I have arrived at an age and a certain social standing where I become quite embarrassed of the fact that I visit Geylang. Because, I did go to Geylang this last Saturday (no less) and I'm frankly embarrassed. After all, Ramadhan is supposed to be a month of worship, Quranic recitation, quiet contemplation and if all else fails, plenty of sleep. As such, Geylang is sort of a bustling, stark-raving contradiction in this context. But we've got to buy our 'raya' clothes, those little green envelopes and most importantly, deng-deng somewhere; so I guess, I must acquisce to the mass-Malay commercialised mania and join in. Besides, in my defence, I did perform the Tarawih prayers first, and then watched a movie (which is also incidentally very much un-Ramadhan like and the fact that I was salivating over Jessica Biel really compounds matters) before going to Geylang shortly after midnight. The crowd sorta thins out after midnight - I repeat, sorta.

Let me be honest. There are actually two main reasons why I'm not too hot about going to Geylang. Socially, I refuse to be part of the Mat parade, which inevitably I would be, bearing in mind my skin colour and the simple fact that I'm in Geylang. However, my saving grace would be perhaps my lack of hair which does not compute into the blonde/brown/red Mat variety. Practically, it's really too bloody crowded. Some years, I do get excited about going to Geylang, especially thinking about the exhaustive selection of food, or maybe because I'm desperate to buy something to wear for Hari Raya, but once I'm there, I suffer from rapid diminishing marginal returns. It's incredibly hot, people keep bumping into you, and especially now, I just might bump into students which I did, incidentally on the said Saturday.

Anyway, midnight on a weekday night means that I've got to turn in. Till the next inspiration. Make full use of the last remaining days of Ramadhan. As you may well know, we never know if we're gonna see the next one. No more Jessica Biel for me. Sigh. Her ass is incredible.

P.S. Do you think God gives more points cos I have to struggle so much to stay on the path of the righteous?

Cyber-Spying

Wed, 26 Sep 2007 23:49:00 GMT

Of late, I have been snooping about in my students' blogs and there have been some rather juicy finds. The thing about blogs is that once you find one, you'll get them all! Maniacal laughter and all that

I'm feeling rather relaxed at the moment with nothing much to do at work. I'm sorta bracing myself for tomorrow, when the exam papers will start streaming in. Ok, it's not so much streaming, as it is, an avalanche, or the buzzword these days, a tsunami but, I'm kind of ready for it - which is why, I'm adamant about doing absolutely nothing these few days. Of course, in any given work situation, you'd be an idiot to tell people that you have nothing to do - what with all the backstabbing and the arrowing and the incessant gossiping (of which, I'm normally a part of).

Looking at the workload of some, I'm amazed at how little I have on my plate. I hardly get arrowed to do anything. Not a CCA in charge, not a form teacher, no committee affiliations and no extra marking of which, for the last one especially, I'm eternally grateful cos I absolutely detest marking.

However, being the restless, ambitious, over-eager sod that I am, I initiate all sorts of nonsense in an attempt to boost my profile, bolster my portfolio, and sometimes, simply for my students. Yes, I do teach because I actually like the interaction and the fulfillment, but the money really helps. And so, my altruistic side arranged remedial lessons for some of my students on some of the days, thinking that the weaker students needed some extra help. The problem however, arose when I made it voluntary and too many of my students attended. Now, I kinda regret opening the classes up to just anybody.

Anyway, we're in the midst of Ramadan and the religious obligations are going quite well. Rather frequent Tarawih sessions, I complete the five obligatories almost everyday, immersing in the Quran - it's all good. In fact, I've even managed to stick to a three-times-a-week gym sessions in school after which, I'll immediately rush home to shower, perform my prayers and indulge in the bliss of sleep waking up just in time to break my fast.

Thus far, I've also discovered that it is morally perilous to be walking around town right before the breaking of the fast since it is a veritable boob parade. Singaporean girls these days really show off a lot of boob. On the rare occasions I was in town (meaning, Orchard area), it was oops, cleavage here, goodness, half a boob there, and nipple see through, look away, look away! I must emphasize that it really is not my fault. Most guys have vision which is hormonally-driven and thus, we're blameless. It is the fault of nature.

Flower Show Riots...

Sun, 09 Sep 2007 11:42:05 GMT

Let me advertise a lil somethin' somethin'

The plan was simple. Get two guitars, a bass, a keyboard and a drumset. And rock. Five different people. One common goal: To change the face of Singapore music.

Easily the hottest and most exciting new band in Singapore right now, the Great Spy Experiment have come a long way since their first gig in a dive bar in March 2005. Drawing influences from musicians as diverse as Ash, Explosions in the Sky, The Killers, Underworld, Franz Ferdinand, Mansun, Sigur Ros, Metallica, Radiohead, Kent, Force Vomit, Supergrass, Muse, Suede and Interpol, the band’s music can only be described as ‘a champagne-fuelled orgy of powerpop, indie, rock and dance, informed by everything except J-Lo’. As much guitar-led as it is beat-driven, with indie riffs juxtaposing irresistable pop hooks, and dance textures overlaying dance-able rock-grooves, the music is created with the dancefloor in mind and the bedroom at heart.

In spite of having only an independently-released single to their name, the band has gone from virtual unknowns to the nation’s indie darlings, all within the span of just over a year, thanks to their incessant gigging and electrifying live performances, some of which include internationally renowned events such as the Baybeats and Zouk festivals. In March, the band travelled to the USA where they tore the stages at the South-by-Southwest Festival in Austin, as the first Singaporean representatives in the 21-year old event, and the San Antonio Indie Fest and rocked the airwaves with live radio showcases in the two cities, garnering numerous fans along the way. In April, the band travelled to the USA again, this time to perform at New York’s Central Park, making yet another slice of history as the first Singaporean band to take the stage at the renowned venue. This month sees them being the sole Singaporean representatives at the inaugural SingFest held at Fort Canning Park.

The Great Spy Experiment release their debut album, “Flower Show Riots” on 3 September 2007. Recorded at Snakeweed Studio, the album is co-produced by Leonard Soosay and Wayne Thunder (The Suns), and was mastered in New York by Howie Weinberg, a renowned engineer who has worked with Muse, Franz Ferdinand, the Beastie Boys, Nirvana, Billy Corgan and many, many more acclaimed artistes.

As far as I’m concerned, this is one of the most eagerly anticipated local releases ever. Trust me. Based on what I’ve heard and seen from their live shows, listeners will be in for a good ol’ rocking treat. - www.trigger-ed.com

Flower Show Riots is a confident and assured debut and music fans everywhere should sample its varied delights. – Pop Culture Press

Flower Show Riots sounds really good and stands up easily to any modern rock LP you may care to point out on the Billboard Album Charts. Not a claim one can honestly make with reference to a Singapore band but I believe that there’s no exaggeration to declare Flower Show Riots a minor tour de force. – www.powerofpop.com

Singaporean indie music has never sounded this superb. - TODAY

A dance-rock killer that will slay both dance anoraks and indie scenesters. A keeper. - Life!

The Great Spy Experiment's album, “Flower Show Riots” is now available at HMV, Sembawang Music, Gramophone, and all good record stores!! Get it now!

Welcome to the flower show.

September 2007

here i am again

Thu, 16 Aug 2007 13:20:06 GMT

McDonald's now has an incredibly fast connection. I'm amazed. You'll be amazed. I thought I'd never see the day when free wireless connection would be this fast. Have I mentioned that it's free?

Anyway, life's been rather busy these days - with marking, paper-setting, frequent screaming and the odd ball-carrying. People sometimes wonder why I work twelve hour days almost every day, but the truth is, you don't really feel it. Work's sorta fun and every once in a while, even fulfilling.

Don't really feel like carrying on. Later then.

bad bitch conditions

Sun, 22 Jul 2007 07:18:39 GMT

I must first quickly apologise for the break in consistent posting though if I'm not wrong, I have warned that this would happen, what with the beginning of the school term and all.

Currently, I'm listening to Edwin McCain's 'I'll Be' on repeat. I only recently discovered this song and I'm hooked. Apparently, it was the soundtrack for Dawson's Creek - some show that was never shown in Singapore for some reason or the other.

Anyhow, I was supposed to have a soccer game this afternoon but it has been cancelled due to bad pitch conditions. As an irritating result, I have nothing to do. I have thus decided to go Ikea to buy some superfluous items for my desk at work. As of now, the bloody idiot who is supposed to vacate the table and thereafter leave it for me has not done so and it has been really pissing me off. That table should have been cleared by Wednesday for goodness sakes. I'm probably gonna hate the bastard for the rest of my time in that school. How much more inconsiderate can you get?

A few weeks ago, some girl from my school enquired as to whether I have a blog; a specifically Xanga blog. I reacted nonchalantly that I didn't know what in the world she was talking about but I do worry that she might have stumbled upon my blog. Bloody fictionaire must have introduced his blog to his students and they could have wandered onto my desolate space from there. This really sucks. Although my profile picture is rather ambiguous, I have on many occasions put up incriminating photographs. I can't really write without fear of persecution now. Maybe I should just shut down this site and open up a new one or just forget about blogging once and for all. This happens to the best of us, doesn't it? We'll see.

Life has been rather routine thus far but it's been really interesting. Despite cursing every other day the fact that many of my friends earn much, much more than me, I need to realize that not many jobs are as engaging and fulfilling as this. And despite not many minutes passing by without me trying to come with a scheme to get my ass on the fast track, I have come to realize that I might just maybe miss the level of interaction that you get only if you stay on this humble track. Well, as with most things, que sera sera.

In other news, I've eagerly signed myself up for a sailing course which will take place during the September holidays and some English teaching course which would see me sit through classes every single wednesday for two months. It better be fun or at the very least, useful.

I brought home two stacks of marking and I have yet to even open up my bag. Well, tomorrow is another day.

Politickas Dexteritas Part Deux

Thu, 05 Jul 2007 15:13:27 GMT

I had the most delicious afternoon nap just now, and I'm suffering the insomniac consequence. You must however bear in mind that the time now is only 11.35 p.m. but it is quite late to me since I normally give up the fight at slightly after ten. I'm thus feeling like quite the night owl. I always end up regretting my afternoon naps though, at the exact moment my senses get assaulted by the morning alarm. Waking up in the wee hours has definitely not gotten easier.

It has been almost two weeks since school started and it has been quite the eye-opener. I'm trying to absorb things as quickly as possible and therfore surf wave after wave of information instead of getting wiped out by the surf. I might not recover if my head accidentally hits the dangerous corals underneath. I know the metaphor is extending itself almost ridiculously but who cares. I've always wanted to be a surfer. That, I think was my childhood dream. I discovered in Bali however that surfing wasn't too easy, exhilarating though it might be.

In two weeks, I've come to learn a lot about the school - many of which cannot be mentioned here since cyberspace has its fair share of snoop doggy doggs. What I can say though, is that as a neophyte in this tricky landscape, I need to tread carefully. Some of you guys might not believe I'm saying this, but I must really watch my mouth. Listen well, but speak very carefully. Niccolo himself might have problems navigating the political terrain here. And being an alumni of a school which prides itself on its motto of 'Ingenium, Diligentia, Dexteritas', I must constantly remember to immerse myself fully into these precepts. I will be the embodiment, the personification, the words of power made to life. I know - a bit much.

In more earth shattering news, deranged Muslims all over the world are still creating problems for their brethren especially in the case of those doctors who can't even create a decent car bomb. I have been to Glasgow and some other parts of Scotland and the people there are really nice. I absolutely adore the Scottish. In fact, let me tell you this anecdote. For the not so smart, its a short story, not the cure to some poison.

We were trying to get to this particular shopping centre and we stopped for a bit at Burger King. And so we decided to ask this rather portly man for directions. Although he seemed really happy wolfing down his burger, he stopped and gave us directions with the help of the map we had. Despite still being confused, we plodded on to our rented car to follow the directions given. As we were walking, we heard him shout for us to come back. Thinking he was choking, (not really, but I add this for dramatic effect) we rushed back to see him draw us a map of how to get there. Slightly amused by this really helpful man still hanging on to a double whopper (I believe), we were thereafter convinced we could easily get to our intended destination. As we were getting into our car, a little red car suddenly drove alongside us. It was the jolly fat man again with his wife in tow yelling to us quite excitedly to follow him. He would lead us to the shopping centre. Absolutely unbelievable.

As you can surmise from the story, people there are really nice. There are of course many other examples of general graciousness by the people there. As such, I really don't see why these middle eastern fuckers have to sully the pristine image of Islam, by being such utter morons. Of course they might have been Russians or Koreans for that matter and the CIA or the Mossad have somehow distorted the story to put the blame on those poor innocent men. I mean, they blame every single misfortune on Islamic terrorists. Apparently they wanted to name Hurricane Katrina, Hurricane Osama, but thought it would have been too obvious. No, I didn't read it from somewhere. I only just made it up. Come on guys, say it! Say the five words!

Last week of freedom

Tue, 19 Jun 2007 19:10:26 GMT

I'm again in front of my monitor at three plus in the morning, with absolutely nada to do. I realize that I need to relish this feeling of complete boredom before I get totally swamped by work. As the school holidays come to an end, so will late nights, lazing for hours in front of the tv and closer to the metaphorical home, much less blogging. As such, the agenda for the week will be as such - tomorrow will be spent waking up as late as possible, scraping together a semblance of something healthy to consume which would normally consist of fried egg whites accompanied by bread before heading off for rugby training in the evening. I'm hoping that I wouldn't look like an absolute idiot playing the actual game for the first time and that, I won't also die of exhaustion. It has been a long time since I last ran due to my problematic ankle. I would probably need to pick my mom up at about close to midnight as she gets back from Penang before maybe hanging out again till the wee hours of the morning.

Thursday would see another day of lazing around unless I get inspired and either go to the gym, indulge in a game of badminton or even swim. The possibility of these activities hinges on the availability of either my other half or captain funky curls. We'll see how it works out. Night time would see another bout of chilling and talking about boobs, squirting and weekend car mats. It would have to be an early night. Friday would start early and be occupied, thank goodness by a Staff Retreat, playing however, godawful games at some obscure locale in Kallang. This will be followed by rugby training again and perhaps a movie at night if anything good is showing. Anybody wanna recommend anything? If things get really boring, I might just head for Mustafa to stock up on my cereal.

The weekend's gonna be quite eventful before I quietly brace myself for an entirely new semester on Sunday night. Please do wish me luck as I embark on my life-changing crusade to mould young minds and carry balls whenever possible. I'll officially start work on Monday. Finally.

Ad Nauseam Ad Infinitum

Mon, 18 Jun 2007 18:46:52 GMT

I don't really have anything to write about today but since I have nothing else to do at three in the morning, I thought that I'd just type something inconsequential. I've been avidly reading the papers these past few days trying to make sense of the en bloc phenomenon and the thing which disturbs me the most is the fact that there'll be very few roomy flats left by the time this insatiable hurricane runs its course. I mean it is bad enough that the new flats in Punggol, Sengkang and the like are the size of toilets; they are now demolishing all these perfectly fine old blocks which has much bigger square footage to make midget sized apartments which will cost exorbitant amounts of money. This is why living in Singapore will suck more and more.

I simply cannot comprehend how the government can wish for a 6.5 million population and expect to increase or even maintain the quality of life. Most people in developed countries have basic dreams like owning their own homes which they hope to have more space than the average rat's nest and a simple car to drive around for convenience. They also hope for ample places of leisure where they can stroll about at ease without having to avoid walking into people every few seconds. And also, to shop in peace without constantly having to jostle with truckloads of people with some of them smelling like garbage. These, to me are simple aspirations of citizens living in a developed nation. They have tried to compare Singapore with frenetic cities like Tokyo, New York and London, but the most obvious point is that people there can easily drive an hour and find respite in the countryside whereas Singaporeans drive an hour only to get stabbed while filling up on petrol. We are comparing apples to oranges. Plain lunacy.

This is why, many amongst us aspire to be 'quitters' given half the chance and just live a simple, uncomplicated life in perhaps NZ or Australia and now, a most popular choice, Canada. There'll definitely be the fair share of detractors who'd immediately point out several glaring problems with migrating. The most obvious ones would be about being second class citizens, the 'too slow' pace of life, and the uprooting of familial ties. Ever since I was enlisted into National Service, I have never felt like a first class citizen. Various incidents have entirely convinced me that as long as I'm not Sinicized, I shall never receive first class treatment as a citizen. Thus, it would be nothing I'm not used to. Secondly, its not the fast pace of life in Singapore I'm concerned about - its more the many bottlenecks we see all over the country. The crowded parks, the race for parking lots, and the damn queues. Always with the queues. Besides, as I've mentioned, its not enough that we're indoctrinated to join the rat race since day one, we are now being forced to live like rats as well, as long as we're not multi-millionaires. Some flats in Punggol already look like those rat mazes we see on tv. The only problem I can see would be that my extended family would be a flight away.

Imagine owning a house where your children can run around in. Imagine that this same house has both a front and a backyard. Now, imagine that your children can grow up hiking, camping and even mountain biking in the nearby woods. They can enjoy weekends of canoeing up and down frothy rivers. They can cycle up and down the street without getting knocked down by rushing vehicles. I can imagine so much more. This is the life I want for myself and in the days to come, the family that I'd hopefully raise. I would hate to see my children studying their childhood away. I do not want to live an unfulfilled life, always dreaming for more breathing space, for more driving space, for any sort of space. I've always thought I was that city mouse in the children's classic story, but now I realize that city-life is getting to me. And I don't think I'm alone. There needs to be a line drawn in the sand. Economic progress cannot be at the expense of quality of life. There is such a thing as going too far and no amount of landscaping can save Singapore from its own success.